Page 1 Page 2 Page 3 Page 4 Page 5 Page 6 Page 7 Page 8 Page 9 Page 10 Page 11 Page 12 Page 13 Page 14 Page 15 Page 16 Page 17 Page 18 Page 19 Page 20 Page 21 Page 22 Page 23 Page 24 Page 25 Page 26 Page 27 Page 28 Page 29 Page 30 Page 31 Page 32 Page 33 Page 34 Page 35 Page 36 Page 37 Page 38 Page 39 Page 40 Page 41 Page 42 Page 43 Page 44 Page 45 Page 46 Page 47 Page 48 Page 49 Page 50 Page 51 Page 52 Page 53 Page 54 Page 55 Page 56 Page 57 Page 58 Page 59 Page 60 Page 61 Page 62 Page 63 Page 64 Page 65 Page 66 Page 67 Page 68 Page 69 Page 70 Page 71 Page 72 Page 73 Page 74 Page 75 Page 76 Page 77 Page 78 Page 79 Page 80 Page 81 Page 82 Page 83 Page 84The ex-spouse may look for reasons to fight custody arrangements, what is called a “modification of custody” or a “modification of visitation.” Nelson has seen a lot of situations where the ex-spouse files for these changes to the divorce settlement, especially when new siblings are coming into the blended family. The new step-parent can even become the subject of a “custody evaluation,” as part of the modification requests in which the ex-spouse can request a psychological evaluation of the step-parent to determine if the children are safe around this new person. When it comes to visitation and custody, the families coming together have some practical considerations as well. Do you want to have both sets of children at the house at the same time or not? Some families prefer to have the entire blended family together whenever possible (which likely gives the parents some weekends alone while kids are visiting the exes), and others find it best to have the biological siblings one group at a time. Nelson says, “Usually, regardless of primary custody, you want them together,” but it’s certainly a decision each family has to make. You first have to examine how the kids “mesh.” It’s likely the children have grown up with different parenting styles, so it’s important to communicate about the new house rules for…pretty much everything. Beckloff says it’s inevitable that the kids will be keeping tabs. Who is getting better gifts? Are the step-parents paying more attention to their own children? Is the biological parent now focusing more on the new step-children? He says, “Just be aware they will do it, and talk about their concerns with them.” The tendency to keep tabs is natural for siblings anyway and heightened that much more in a blended family. He adds that research says when families first come together, the step-parent should take a back seat. The biological mom or dad should parent their own children at first and allow for a natural growth as the step-parent takes on more of the parenting role. It should be a slow process. Of course, when the biological parents, the step-parents and the ex-spouses can all communicate without hostility and keep the welfare of the children as the number one priority, the process can be a (relatively) smooth one. A blended family can be a blessing. In the end, it can mean new relationships with more people that love you—and that’s a good thing for everyone involved. Keith Nelson, Partner of Orsinger, Nelson, Downing, & Anderson, LLP, is a highly respected family law attorney with more than 30 years of experience. A father of six, and grandfather of three, he has a profound interest in issues involving children, and he is known for his ability to identify, address, and mitigate the psychological impact of custody and divorce litigation on children and their parents. In recognition of this expertise, he was appointed to serve on the Texas Supreme Court Committee on Visitation and Child Support Guidelines. A graduate of the Baylor University School of Law, Mr. Nelson is board certifiedinfamilylawbytheTexasBoardofLegalSpecializationandhasbeenanauthor and lecturer on family law related topics for more than 20 years. What would happen if your income was gone tomorrow? It’s not something that any of us want to think about, but insurance is the best way to make sure your loved ones are taken care of after you’re gone. Just like a medical check-up, you need an insurance check-up to re-examine your policies and see if they are still the best fit for you. Call to Schedule Your Complimentary 360 Review and Life Insurance Check-Up Bobby Davidson, Bobby@davidsoninsservices.com 972.980.4884 D A V I D S O N INSURANCE S E R V I C E S Insuring Your Life. Ensuring Your Family’s Future. continued from Yours,Mine&Ours | Page 34